Sunday, September 18, 2011

A Wife's Football Strategy

I wish I loved football.

My husband, originally from the Chicago area, is a die hard Bears fan.  When the Bears are on television, Brian puts on his jersey and cranks up the surround sound to a point where the house literally shakes.  He claps, cheers and shouts as he watches the game.  He also "talks" to the referees, which is my personal favorite.

He is so passionate about the game, but unfortunately, I'm more passionate about a good cucumber salad.

Occasionally he will look over at me, hoping to share a victorious moment, only to find me painting my nails or typing a blog.  Ahem.

He even bought me a jersey hoping to spark some love for the game.  Smart move.  Because if anything is going to ignite passion in me, it's new clothes.  This jersey is fitted though the waist with ruffled sleeves and diamond bling adorning the v-neck.  It's a diva jersey.  Score!  Figuratively speaking, of course.

I'm not a stupid person, but I just can't grasp the rules of football.  I don't know the difference between a blitz, a safety and a pylon.  In fact, I barely know the difference between offense and defense. It's some sort of block that I have.

And speaking of "block", I'm sure that I could have used a funny and poignant football analogy IF I KNEW ANYTHING ABOUT FOOTBALL.

So I tried a new strategy today to support my husband's love of pigskin.  I occasionally repeated the last thing that I heard the commentator say in the form of a question:

"A penalty flag?"
"Three yards until a 1st down?"
"Cutler's off today?"

This gives the appearance that I actually care while giving Brian someone to talk to with the perception that I'm actually interested.  Total win-win.  Our chances of winning are higher than the Bears.

This is a tactic that I learned in college while completing my psychology degree.  All a counselor really has to do is repeat the last few words of a client's sentence to keep the conversation going.

"I'm in this mess because of what happened with my mother!"
"Your mother?"

Good to know that my high-dollar education is finally paying off.

Go Bears!