First off, you never really know how much your husband does around the house until he's out of town. On a typical Thursday, you might think that his only household contributions are taking out the garbage and quoting ESPN stats, but on the Thursday that he's out of town, you're so overwhelmed that you are ready to call in the troops. And by troops, I mean Xanex and vodka.
Drew, my two year old, missed his Dad like nothing I've ever seen. Need proof? Check out this video of Drew expressing his discontentment.
Did you hear that loud CRACK while you were watching this video? It was the sound of my heart breaking. And at the end when he runs toward the door? That was because he thought Brian was on the front porch. If you don't cry watching that, you're not human.
Bailey used this opportunity to sleep in the bed with me. She's ten years old, but when it comes to sleeping in Mama's bed, she's more like one-and-a-half... maybe two years old. It's a rare but recognized disorder. I think Elvis had it.
Why are all kids who want to sleep with their parents the most rambunctious sleepers?
When she sleeps with me, it's like Karate Kid Part I, II and III. And even that new one with Will Smith's son. I have to wax on/ wax off all night long just to protect myself from visible bruising.
One night, I woke up about 2 am with Bailey's foot in my mouth. Like, literally, in my mouth.
So I said, "Bwaaoilea gawwwh aaahwah wahoohawwwbai!" (Translation: "Bailey, get your foot out of my mouth!") She would have totally been able to understand me IF HER FOOT HAD NOT BEEN IN MY MOUTH.
We all managed to get through the week even though we felt like something was missing. And that something is a someone who we are very proud to call our own.
Welcome back, Brian! Now take out the garbage and tell us what you saw on ESPN.